How I fell for my fwb(friends w benefits) without even realizing it..

When I met him, I saw a man that was hardworking, sweet, kind, and not looking for anything serious either.. He was a bad boy but something about him drew me in. Maybe it was the way he carried himself or the way he would smile at me.. I was so intrigued. I needed to know more. From the start, we made it clear we both weren’t looking for a relationship or anything serious for that matter. It was just going to be “for fun”. And that it was.

We became bestfriends overnight it felt like. We were so open and honest with one another and it was relieving being around someone who knew your intentions and didn’t expect the world from you. It was exciting and new and we both just wanted to enjoy what we had while it lasted. I was myself around him, I didn’t have to pretend or fake something I wasn’t. I was able to laugh and smile and goof around with him, that undeniably scared me. But I ignored it. The friendship we grew in such a short time was one I realized I was scared to lose.. And this is when I began to worry.. Was I falling for him?

Being comfortable with someone else is an amazing feeling. Not having to hide any parts of you and being able to talk to them about anything, its kind of just.. calming. After a few months of talking and hanging out here and there, I found out he had someone else. In that moment, I realized, “well shit.. I think I may be in love with him”.. it was crazy and I convinced myself I was losing it and who was I to have anything to say or to judge based on the situation.. I was a nobody. I was simply his bestfriend. I dated around and what not while we talked, but it was never the same. With him, I felt like I was on cloud nine. I felt like nothing else in the world mattered. I realized.. we had broke all the rules fwb are suppose to do.. Now what?

After all, we broke every single rule the more I looked at it. We became so comfortable with one another, we would find ourselves cuddling skin on skin and laughing and kissing.. We found ourselves sending random texts throughout the week when something good happens or you saw something that made you think of them..We began to get bothered when they wouldn’t answer our message right away, lowkey wondering what are they doing?is she with him?is he with her? are they thinking about me? Countless amounts of questions wed never admit. We began to rather hangout with one another instead of go out to dinner with our dates, or go to a party, or anything else.. because quality time was just “more fun”.We began being there for each other a lot more emotionally and realized no one quite understood us like one another.

Months and months go by, and suddenly one random night, we look at each other and realize we fell in love. Absolutely not on purpose, without plan, without even trying. We fell helplessly in love with one another. And that my friends.. is how you fall in love with your bestfriend without even noticing it.

Open letter to his ex’s who let him go

I know all about you guys, I know mainly the bad parts but I also know some of the good. You probably assume he only tells me(the new girl), the worst things but youre wrong.. This is one of many reasons, hes with me, not you.. You assume. You think the lowest of him and you look down upon him. I have been with him for quite a few years now and I really don’t understand how anyone could let a man like him go. Than again, I feel as if I have a side of him nobody ever got to experience. For that, I am so grateful.

I know you guys have tried reaching out to him, its been months, years but you throw him a text to say hello or ask how hes doing. Or maybe you reach out because you realize you messed up or you see hes doing well and you want him back. I know you guys enough to know you wanted the satisfaction of getting a rise out of him and any kind of reply just to see if his feelings are still there. I also know you’re starting to realize that its different with me unlike the other girls he dated after you that he would mess around with until you guys would get back, I know you’re starting to realize hes not going to take the chance of messing things up with me.

I’m not sitting here trying to act like I am better than you or prettier than you or smarter than you. But I am sitting here letting you know he loves me more than he ever did with either of you. I love him more and more each day and I never let it slip, I never let him question my love for him, or especially my trust. I didn’t come into his life by meeting him at a club.. I didn’t come into his life by begging for a title.. I didn’t come into his life bringing him craziness or stress or a tiring relationship. I came into his life calmly and peacefully. I came into his life offering nothing but friendship and with that, we fell helplessly in love.

You probably assume hes going to screw me over and hurt me the way he did to you. Welp, wrong again. Ive heard countless amounts of stories and by the looks of the way you present yourself, I don’t understand how you expected him or anyone for that matter to ever respect you. I treat him with respect and loyalty, and that’s what he gives me in return.

But all in all, as much as it makes me itch at the thought of all of you, I no longer let any of it get to me. I don’t hate you or dislike you or am out to get you. Because I won. Whether you will ever admit it or not. You guys got the boy and I got the man. I get to wake up beside him every morning and kiss him goodnight each night. I want to thank you for hurting him and showing him the worst kind of “love” possible, because I was the one who was able to really love him and give him what he deserved. I am the one by his side. And I am the one who has the privilege of spending forever in his arms.